Saturday, May 16, 2009

Failure? Don't Count Me Out Yet!

I've been out of sight basically since I took the interim teaching position. I've also been out of the gym & off the charts with consumption of junk. So, have I failed? After thinking about it, I'm going to say NO! I can only fail if I give up & quit trying. So here I am once again, starting over. I've gained back most of what I had lost - like so many of us do. I've also re-evaluated where I really want to be ultimately & have done a new weight loss ticker. My new goal consists of me dropping 80.5 lbs. I realize that this is no small task, but it is doable. I will admit, I even thought about trying to get in on a casting call for Biggest Loser (one of my favorite shows), but they are looking for family member each needing to lose 100lbs or more. Two problems with this request, 1) I don't think that any doctor would say that I needed to lose 100lbs - they would actually get me back to a weight that I haven't been since I was beginning my sophomore year in high school & as I recall, I didn't look that healthy then; 2) I don't have any family members that need to lose 100lbs either. So, looking at things from my glass 1/2 full perspective - that's an upside, I'm not big enough to qualify for the Biggest Loser. LOL.

I also want to apologize to you wonderful people who have been so willing to give me support in the past. I know I've let you down. Not only have I not been successfully trying to make the gym or watch my diet, but I haven't even included you on what's going on with me and for that I'm sorry! You all probably have no idea how much your support has helped & I hope you will all forgive me for the hiatus & lend me that support again - as I NEED it, DESPERATELY!!!

I have two more weeks & 1 day left of school. Start over plan is as follows. For the next two weeks, control my diet as much as possible. Try to wean myself off of the diet soda (I know the calories aren't bad, but I've been reading that these really aren't a healthy option either), try to consume the recommended 8 glasses of water daily (this one is tough for me - I hate the stuff), try not to eat foods that have no nutritional value, and try to at least get outside & get in a brisk walk a few times a week until I can get back to my morning Zumba classes. Once I'm out of school, I'm planning to rejoin my wonderful friends at Zumba on Tues/Thurs & seek out some other classes that get me out of my comfort zone - I find that I work harder in a class environment where I feel like others will notice if I don't. So, here I am again, putting myself out there for all the world to see. Admitting that I've screwed up (AGAIN) & trying to right my wrongs - so don't count me out yet.


Amy S. said...

Hey lady! You shouldn't appologize to us! That is crazy. We are your support system, not your guilt causing system. Make peace with yourself, because you are at peace with us no matter what. We are here for you to support you and cheer you on. You can do this, keep that glass half full (and the plate half as full). Good luck, you can do this!

Jenn@slim-shoppin said...

I guess I came to your blog at a great time then!

This is my first visit!

I have lost and gained weight for the longest time, so I know where you are, and I agree, its never over if you keep dusting yourself off and coming back. My sister even made a t-shirt for me last christmas that says "I'm back on" (meaning I'm back on my health eating plan again!) since I've said it so many times.

I wish you all the luck, you can totally do it, and I will do it with you!!

gary said...

Hey, you have a great site! I have recently started my own weight loss journey and found some hope in your story.

Lately I think my scale has been lying to me. I have decided that throwing it out the window is too easy on it. Instead, I am going to punish it by putting my full weight on it every day! Yes, I have begun to have anger issues with inanimate objects...this too shall pass.

Michelle said...

I so want to do BL too but sadly I have over 100 to lose but no one near me in my family has over 100 to lose.
Good for you that you are to small!
Good Luck!